"My name is Ricardo. My house is completely intact." #51 | | |
"We'll shoot it _here_, dear," said the first photographer. "Stand by the archway of that store. There's a nice antique wall over there." He peered into the mysteries of his camera. #52 | | |
"So!" A dreadful quiet came upon Ricardo. He watched them prepare. When they were ready to take the picture he hurried forward, calling to a man in a doorway. "Jorge! What are you _doing_?" #53 | | |
"I'm just standing here," said the man. #54 | | |
"Well," said Ricardo, "isn't that _your_ archway? Are you going to let them _use_ it?" #55 | | |
"I'm not bothered," said Jorge. #56 | | |
Ricardo shook his arm. "They're treating your property like a movie actor's place. Aren't you insulted?" #57 | | |
"I haven't thought about it." Jorge picked his nose. #58 | | |
"Jesus upon earth, man, _think_!" #59 | | |
"I can't see any harm," said Jorge. #60 | | |
"Am I the _only_ one in the world with a tongue in my mouth?" said Ricardo to his empty hands. "And taste on my tongue? Is this a town of false picture scenes? Won't anyone do something about this except me?" #61 | | |
The crowd had followed them down the street, gathering others to it as it came; now it was of a fair size and more were coming, drawn by Ricardo's bullish shouts. He stamped his feet. He made fists. He spat. #62 | | |
The cameraman and the models watched him nervously. #63 | | |
"Do you want a _quaint_ man in the background?" he said wildly to the cameraman. "I'll pose back here. Do you want me near this wall, my hat _so_, my feet _so_, the light so and thus on my sandals which I made myself? Do you want me to rip this hole in my shirt a bit larger, eh, like _this_? _So!_ Is my face smeared with enough perspiration? Is my hair long enough, kind sir?" #64 | | |
"Stand there if you want," said the photographer. #65 | | |
"I won't look in the camera," Ricardo assured him. #66 | | |
The photographer smiled and lifted his machine. "Over to your left one step, dear." The model moved. "Now turn your right leg. That's fine. Fine, fine. _Hold_ it!" The model froze, chin tilted up. #67 | | |
Ricardo dropped his pants. #68 | | |
"Oh, my God!" said the photographer. #69 | | |
Some of the models squealed. The crowd laughed and pummeled each other a bit. Ricardo quietly raised his pants and leaned against the wall. #70 | | |
"Was that quaint enough?" he said. #71 | | |
"Oh, my God!" muttered the photographer. #72 | | |
"Let's go down to the docks," said his assistant. #73 | | |
"I think _I'll_ go there, too." Ricardo smiled. #74 | | |
"Good God, what can we do with the idiot?" whispered the photographer. #75 | | |
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"You didn't try high enough," said the assistant. #78 | | |
"Listen, you run get a policeman. I'll put a stop to this." #79 | | |
The assistant ran. Everyone stood around smoking cigarettes nervously, eying Ricardo. A dog came by and briefly made water against the wall. #80 | | |
"Look at that!" cried Ricardo. "What art! What a pattern! Quick, before the sun dries it!" #81 | | |
The cameraman turned his back and looked out to sea. #82 | | |
The assistant came rushing along the street. Behind him, a native policeman strolled quietly. The assistant had to stop and run back to urge the policeman to hurry. The policeman assured him with a gesture, at a distance, that the day was not yet over, and, in time, they would arrive at the scene of whatever disaster lay ahead. #83 | | |
The policeman took up a position behind the two cameramen. "What seems to be the trouble?" #84 | | |
"That man up there. We want him removed." #85 | | |
"That man up there seems only to be leaning against a wall," said the officer. #86 | | |
"No, no, it's not the leaning, he— oh, hell," said the cameraman. "The only way to explain is to show you. Take your pose, dear." #87 | | |
The girl posed. Ricardo posed, smiling casually. #88 | | |
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Ricardo dropped his pants. #91 | | |
Click went the camera. #92 | | |
"Ah," said the policeman. #93 | | |
"Got the evidence right in this old camera if you need it!" said the cameraman. #94 | | |
"Ah," said the policeman, not moving, hand to chin. "So." He surveyed the scene like an amateur photographer himself. He saw the model with the flushed, nervous marble face, the cobbles, the wall, and Ricardo. Ricardo magnificently smoking a cigarette there in the noon sunlight under the blue sky, his pants where a man's pants rarely are. #95 | | |
"Well, officer?" said the cameraman, waiting. #96 | | |
"Just what," said the policeman, taking off his cap and wiping his dark brow, "do you want me to do?" #97 | | |
"Arrest that man! Indecent exposure!" #98 | | |
"Ah," said the policeman. #99 | | |
"Well?" said the cameraman. The crowd murmured. All the nice lady models were looking out at the seagulls and the ocean. #100 | | |
